Friday, December 09, 2005

Good Goal Tending

So this is a Harvard bar, huh? I thought there'd be equations and shit on the wall.

Over at BoA, Matt is again encouraging people to come up with a nickname for Edmonton Oilers goaltender Mike Morrison. Morrison, who hails from New England, is 5-1 with the Oil, and appears to be with the club for the long haul. As such, a nickname is required. It appears that the name "Mo" has stuck with teammates, but I reject such a pedestrian and pedantic moniker. It is unbecoming of a man who prepped at Exeter. I have therefore decided to come up with my own nickname for Morrison, one deserving of his stature and geographical eminence, and continue using it until every one is forced to follow suit. So far, I have come up with the following:

"The Exchecker"
"The Expokechecker"
"The Chancellor of the Exchecker"
"The Chancellor of the Expokechecker"
"Ralph Waldo Morrison"
"The Southie Scrambler"
"The Plymouth Rock"
"The Fall of the House of Sutter"
"The Mask of Amontellado"
"The Mick and the Pendulum"
"The Boston Dream"
"Quoth the Goalie: 'Nevermore"
"The Medford Minder"
" The Chappaquiddick Swimmer"
"Paddy Morrison"
"St. Mike, The Patron Saint of Wins"
"Our Lady of Massachusetts"
"The Boston Deke Party"
"The Founding Flopper"
"Sam Chowder"
"Henry Padsworth Longfellow"
"Henry David Fivehole"
"The New England Nabber"

I like "Harvard", "The Plymouth Rock", "Ralph Waldo Morrison", "The Boston Dream", and " The Chappaquiddick Swimmer". Many of these would be great ledes, like "Quoth the Goalie: 'Nevermore", whenever Morrison gets a shutout. Many would be good insults, like "Our Lady of Massachusetts" if he isn't playing too well. And "Good Goal Tending", uttered properly with the requisite "You'll hump a goalies glove?"/"I was just using it for clean-up." exchange, is just smart. Wicked smaht.

I have some more ideas floating around in my head. I will need to sleep on them. Feel free to suggest your own. At the very minimum, we can provide quip fodder for reporters looking to file a game report.


At 12:12 PM, Blogger sacamano said...

I like "Chowdaw".


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