Well, I had a mindblowingly awesome post about the Oilers powerplay that I was going to share with the world today, but the National Hockey League publishes such useless statistics that I can't get all the information that I need for it. Troglodyte bastards. So instead I thought I would put up a quote, a sound clip and a picture, and leave it as an open thread for tonight's game between the Oilers and the Canes. It's a little late in the day, so I hope people see this in time. If not, oh well. I know it's fantastic.
So I'm hangin' out with all of my buddies, and uh, I realize something, I realize something. Think of the group of people you've known the longest in your life. Think of the group of friends you've hung out with the most, maybe you're all here tonight. And this is what I realized, I had an epiphany, and here it is, right here: There is one person, in every group of friends, that nobody fucking likes. You basically keep them there, to hate their guts. When that person is not around the rest of your little base camp, your hobby, is cutting that person down.
Example: Karen, is always a douchebag.
Every group has a Karen and she is always a bag of douche. And when she's not around, you just look at each other and say, "God, Karen, she's such a douchebag!" Until she walks up, then you're like, "Hey, what's up Kar-? Kar-. What's up Kar-?"
I told you a new nickname was coming. I'm rich, beatch!!!